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You know being a great listener is the base to any great relationship.
Want to be a great employee? Learn to listen to what the needs are of your boss better.
Want to be a great boss? Learn to listen the needs of your employees better.
Want to be a great spouse; friend, or sibling. Just remember that the creator gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason. Maybe its for us to pay attention and listen more, then to speak and convey our needs before listening.
I was listening to some audio recordings this morning and the speaker said something that I had heard before, but for some reason it truly hit home today. The speaker said that one can not listen and do other things. Like people will say “Go ahead, I am listening…” as they as washing dishes or scrolling on their phone. A conversation like that is doom for confusion, and problems down the road so it would be better for one party to simply say, “Hey, let me finish with the dishes and then I will be ready to talk and give you the desired attention you deserve.”
Or the party speaking may want to say to the other person doing other things, “Hey, I’ll come back when you are free.”
As the speaker finished up the recording, they left with 3 tips on how to ramp up your listening skills.
Make room for others to speak – Stop Talking! Show with body language that you actually care about this conversation to be had, and that you respect it by giving it your time.
Build bridge and have some patience.
Commit to listening. Give it your time, your focus, as well as your attention so that both parties can get the most out of the conversation.
I hope this little tid bit about listening can help some one. I know when I heard it, I felt or rather heard it a wee bit differently today.
They say when the student is ready, the teacher appears…so just maybe I was your teacher today, and gave you some food for thought.
Parkinson’s Law – work expands to fill the time available for its completion – means that if you give yourself a week to complete a two hour task, then (psychologically speaking) the task will increase in complexity and become more daunting so as to fill that week.
I have a clear example of that…
One day I had to drive for work from 6am til 2pm then I had a few errands to run before heading home and finishing up some writing for a product I am creating when my baby hits me up and says:
“Don’t forget her chorus recital is tonight and that she is staying after school so no worries on picking her up after school as I usually do…”
That put a definite shift in my plans towards getting my writing in for my product that I am creating… but does that mean I can shift my responsibility and just say screw it… No! Not at all… cuz the task at hand expands to the time allowed.
So I made out a plan for myself…
Get errands done by 3pm, Get home by 3:30pm, Write til 5:30pm,
Quickly put a couple veggie burgers in the George Foreman while I take a quick shower…
Once out of the shower, get the veggie burgers out, eat and get dressed at the same time and out the door by 6pm.
My daughter’s recital started at 630pm and it only takes about 15 minutes to get there…
I told myself that any thing I needed to finish up (and there was maybe about one more page worth of content that I had to do ) that I would finish it up once I came home from the recital.
Why am I telling you about this day? Because it was such a time crunch and rush rush situation and I was tired but I didn’t make any excuses I just made it happen!
It would of been very easy to just say you know what I got this recital to go to never mind on writing today.
Since I decided that I was going to get this done and I gave it a time, I was able to complete the task.
But had I of told myself “Aahh I’ll just get it done next week” then the task would of got done next week.
The law is saying it’s not the time or the task at hand it’s you and your motivation and setting the tone for what you will make happen or not make happen in your life.
I’m sharing this to prove to you that just cuz I am writing this to you doesn’t make me someone special… I struggle with time management as well.
The only difference between you and I, and in truth the only difference between us all are the choices we make and the action we do or don’t take!
Set the tone, set the pace and watch things work out great!!
Why hello there everyone! This is my very first blog post since my site got hacked some years ago, and I just never quite got back into the flow of blogging.
Thats been well over 7 years or so now…I know, I know…I’m shaking my head too!!
At one point in my life, I was blogging daily, sometimes twice a day…and I must say that there were many periods where I truly missed blogging.
Only those who do it, can truly understand…cuz for me it is very therapeutic.
So I am back, back to blogging, back to being a full time marketer, back to reading books and just doing all the things that I love to do.
Btw, never let a set back, take you away from doing things that you love to do…EVER!!
That’s what happened with me, I let a WordPress hacker take my spirits along with my website blog.
But any who, so let me tell you about this book I am reading now. And its crazy because I have read it before long time ago, but after doing a morning jog, seeing a ex in the street, totally avoiding a ex in the street, I said to myself I should get back to reading a “physical” book.
You know like a book in ones hand. (smile)
No matter how busy my days have gotten, in the past, I would always listen to a audible book, or some training of some sort, just always feeding my mind.
Like the old saying says “Empty your wallet to feed your head, and in return your head will feed your wallet instead.” or something like that…you get the meaning…
But as I came back in the house, the first book that jumped out at me was this one, “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg.
I thought to myself, how fitting. See for the past 7 years or so, I was pretty much out of the internet marketing space full time. I always did things on the side, but I was a full time truck driver.
And although I love driving, I love trucking moreso, I love me and my family more. So when corona virus reared its ugly head upon us, and schools where closed for weeks, I turned in my trucking keys to stay home with my daughter.
Although she is no baby, she is a teenager, I still saw the handwriting on the wall and decided to get back to my first love, sales and marketing.
(hee hee, you thought I was going to say my daughter didn’t you, shhh don’t tell her)
But back to the book…I saw the book in my library and said how fitting of a reread because I am beginning a whole bunch of new habits. Blogging again, marketing full time online again, exercising, learning new skill-sets, just an array of sorts.
So as I am building new habits, why not read a book about Habits!
There is a passage in the book that reads “Habits can be changed, if we understand how they work……but once you see everything as a bunch of habits, its like someone gave you a flashlight and a crowbar and you can get to work.”
Now I don’t want to give away the book, and truly can’t give away the whole book for copyright reasons, trust me I know, I have tried; but I encourage you to check out this book as it has some very interesting insights on what happens to our brains once a decision to even form a habit, AND what happens to our brain once one acts out the behavior to form the habit.
Very, very interesting stuff…
So I am creating a new habit with you all today, I am stretching my mind in the direction of growth and I will be blogging daily getting back to who I truly am.
Before I close out this post, I want to leave with one more line from the book as I felt it was quite fitting as well as encouraging, and it just simply says ….”there’s nothing you can’t do if you get the habits right.”
Enjoy the rest of your day guys and think about creating yourself a new habit today!